you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
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I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
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I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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