is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
