Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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