did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
