Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
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