awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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