look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize
