Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
pray to the hookup gods
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
