hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
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