ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
