Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Also, beer. Big fan.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
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