then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
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