dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
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A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
As shirtless as possible
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
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Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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