susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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