Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
