Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
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