we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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