We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
false alarm. still invincible.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Randomize
