I didn't shave. On purpose
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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