Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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