I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
