i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize
