are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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