she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize