I just made out with a guy for $7.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
