yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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