Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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