dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
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