I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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