my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
