Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
