And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
