Don't make out with my wife yet
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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