p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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