the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
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Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
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You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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