He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
