She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize
