I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
