Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
