Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
