As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Houston, we have a squirter
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
