I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Randomize