I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Randomize
