About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
