Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I think a kid would responsible me up
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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