I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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