he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize