I wannas sexs uuuuu
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
