But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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