Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
