Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Randomize
